The Indian film that shows the ‘humiliation’ of the bride in the marriage arranged

It is often said that marriages are made in heaven.

But in India, where most marriages are organized, the matching process may seem a step through hell for a woman and her family.

That is Sthal’s premise: A Match, the movie in Language Arenoso 2023 that has won several prestigious awards at festivals in India and abroad. It will be launched for the first time in theaters of India on Friday.

Set in the rural state of Maharashtra, the film focuses on Savita, a young woman who struggles for an education and a career in a patriarchal society, and the attempts of her father Daulatrao Wandhare, a poor cotton farmer, to find a good husband for her daughter.

“He wants a good price for harvest and a good game for his daughter,” says director Jayant Digambar Somalkar.

The film is remarkable for the unwavering form that portrays what its main actress calls the “very humiliating” experience of many young women, unlike other Indian films about arranged marriage.

Sthal has also caught attention since his entire cast is composed of actors for the first time chosen from the town where they shoot. Nandini Chikte, who plays Savita, has already won two awards for his brilliant performance.

The film begins with a sequence in which Savita is interviewing a future boyfriend.

Together with their family and friends, look while the young man serves drinks from a tray. They laugh when he, visibly nervous, falls during the interrogation.

He rudely woke up what turned out to be a dream, he is told to Savita to prepare while a group of men comes to see her.

Actually, gender roles are completely invested, and in a scene that reproduces several times in the movie of almost two hours, Savita’s humiliation focuses.

The future boyfriend and other men of his family are welcome by the father and the male relatives of Savita. The guests are fed with tea and snacks and once the presentations are made, Savita is called.

Dressed in a Sari, with your eyes dejected, she sits in a wooden stool in front of her interrogators.

The questions come, thick and fast. What is your name? Full name? The mother’s clan? Birthdate? Height? Education? Subject? Hobbies? Are you willing to work on the farm?

Men leave, to maintain an argument. “He is a bit dark. He had makeup on his face, but didn’t you see his elbow? That is his true color,” says one. “She is also brief,” he adds. Others nodded.

They leave, telling Daulatrao that they will respond in a few days to let him know his decision.

According to his parents, “this is the fourth or fifth time that someone has come to see Savita”, all previous meetings have ended in rejection, which leads to anguish and despair.

The scene sounds true. In India, men often have a list of attributes that they want in their girlfriends: a look at the marriage columns in the newspapers and the pairing websites shows that everyone wants high, fair and beautiful girlfriends.

Savita’s protests: “I don’t want to marry, I first want to finish university and then take civil services exams and build a career” – do not carry weight in their rural community, where marriage is presented as the only objective that is worth having for a young woman.

“Marriage is given too much importance in our society,” Chikte told the BBC. “Parents believe that once the daughter is married, they will be released from her responsibility. It’s time to change that narrative.”

She says she discovered that she was “very humiliating” that Savita was forced to sit in a stool to be judged by all those men who discussed the color of her skin, while there was no discussion about the future boyfriend.

“I was just acting, but as I advanced the movie, I lived Savita’s trip and I felt angry on her name. I felt insulted and disrespected.”

The film also addresses the social evil that is dowry: the practice of the bride’s family giving cash, clothing and jewelry to the boyfriend’s family.

Although it has been illegal for more than 60 years, the skills remain omnipresent in Indian weddings.

It is known that girls’ parents get huge loans or even sell their lands and home to meet dowry demands. Even that does not necessarily guarantee a happy life for a girlfriend, since the tens of thousands are killed by the boyfriend or their family for bringing insufficient skills.

Also in the film, Dauratrao puts a “sale” sign in his land, despite the fact that agriculture is his only source of livelihood.

The Somalkar director says that the idea of ​​his debut feature is entrenched in his own experience.

Growing up with two sisters and five female cousins, he had witnessed the ritual too many times when the future boyfriends visited their home.

“When he was a child he does not question tradition,” he says, and adds that the turning point arrived in 2016 when he accompanied a male cousin to see a possible girlfriend.

“This was the first time I was on the other side. I felt a bit uncomfortable when the woman came out and sat on a stool and asked me questions. When we went out to an argument, I felt that the conversation about her height and the skin color objectified it.”

When she discussed the problem with her fiancee at that time, which is now her wife, she encouraged him to explore him in his work.

In a country where 90% of all marriages are still organized by families, Sthal is not the first to address the topic on the screen. IMDB has A list of almost 30 films About a arranged marriage made by Bollywood and regional film industries just in the last two decades.

More recently, the popular Netflix show Indian pairing completely focused on the process of finding the perfect couple.

But, as Somalkar points out, “weddings are greatly glamorized” on the screen.

“When we think of weddings in India, we think of the great fat wedding full of fun and glamor. We think of Hum Aapke Hain Koun,” he says, referring to the Bollywood box office success of the 1990s that celebrates the Indian wedding traditions.

“And the Netflix program only dealt with a certain kind of people, who are rich and educated and women can exercise their choice.

“But the reality for most Indians is very different and parents often have to go through hell to marry their daughters,” he adds.

His reason to make Sthal, he says, is “shaking society and the public for complacency.

“I want to start a debate and encourage people to think about a process that objective to women who have very little freedom to choose between marriage and career,” he says.

“I know that a book or a movie does not change society overnight, but it can be a beginning.”

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